Life since my last post...in April.

Hmm. Maybe my goal of blogging often was a bit of stretch. The last post I had was from April. It is now the end of August. So since I have not put anything on here since then I will give a rundown of some of what has happened since then, that is if I can remember any of it.

I got braces! Finally! I have about a year left then I will have the smile I have always wanted. So grateful for the opportunity to straighten out my teeth and open my bite. So now I don't bite my tongue and I can eat corn and not have to worry about it getting stuck in my teeth( now it is my braces that the little corn hairs get stuck in).

I rode a train across Nevada all by myself! I went home and had a great time. I had about a week before we left for Canada to see my Grandparent's and travel around a bit. We went to the Calgary Stampede and had a blast. I was super cranky and tired and kinda freaked out a bit at my family. I had been away from them for so long that I basically forgot how to interact with them. It was a very hard day for me. We went to Drumheller for the Royal Tyrrall Museum( Dinosaurs) and had a lot of fun. The drive out was long but well worth it. We also went shopping at the mall and some of the outlet stores that were around. I got a lot more than I really needed to buy, but I use everything that I bought. Thank heavens. The Sunrise Leisure Center was as awesome as I remember it being. I lost a chunk of the top of my foot to a waters slide. A kiddy slide to be exact. Watch out for dry spots on slides, they will get you when least expect it.

After I got home not much happened. Ooh before my trip I got to hike the "Y". It was a lot of fun. I was somehow stuck between both groups though. Not fast enough for the first group but too fast for the stragglers.

I have been on a total of about 12 dates so far. That includes double dates. Sad day, I know. But it is fine, the last about 4 of those dates were really great. I am glad that they happened because of what I learned from them.

I still am working for the Dentist that hired me when I first moved out here. I really enjoy learning more about how dental offices run. Right now I am learning about insurance claims and how to check out patients. It is a lot of fun being in this office. I hope I will be able to work here for the whole time that I will be living here in Utah. I signed for a year at my complex so now I am stuck here( :D ) I am really enjoying being able to learn how to live on my own without anyone to really rely on. I have learned so much and hope to be able to learn a lot more in my time living on my own.

Right now I am saving up to get a plane ticket out to California for my little sister's baptism. I really hope that I can go. I found out when it will be kinda last minute, so I didn't really get any heads up on how much to save. If I cannot get a plane ticket I will search for an Amtrac ticket there and back and I will just have to take some time off work for it. I hope I can fly though. I would rather be on a plane for a little over an hour and have a lot of time with my family than be stuck on a train for 15 hours and have very limited time with them. If I am not able to go out there I will be getting my tickets for Christmas. I will not miss Christmas with my family.

Um, I can't think of anything else that has happened or that is coming up. So this will end my post for tonight.
Have a good last couple of August 2012 days before September comes.


-Sarah <3

Thoughts.

Can I just vent a little? 

So I am a very secretive person. Very secretive. Like, hide my emotions from others to keep them from worrying about me kind of secretive. I didn't try to be secretive. It just happened. Because I wasn't treated the best for being home schooled. I sheltered myself from the world. I kept to myself and tried not to get in anyone's way. I went a little over the top and sheltered myself from my family too. I was having a hard time and didn't tell anyone. I didn't want people to worry about me. I still don't. I would rather help others than myself. Because this went on for over 12 years it is now second nature to hide my true self from others. I can't really stop myself from this vicious circle that entraps me and controls my almost every thought. I believe that I still keep to myself to avoid being questioned. I am afraid of someone saying that I was bad for keeping it all to myself and not even telling my parents that I was hurting. I still am hurting. I hurt all the time. I try to make it go away. It won't. I still get really sad about random things from my past. There are also things that are or are not happening right now that bother me. I have always wanted someone who will just ask me how I am. Not like a quick "How are you?" but a genuine "Are you ok?", "How can I help you?", "Do you want someone to talk to?". I have had really good friends but never someone who would just stop and listen to me. I think I am afraid of them jumping in and talking about what they had to deal with instead of just listening to what I have to say. A lot of people just jump in when I try to speak. I don't understand why it is so hard to just be quite and listen. I can sit with a group of people and listen to everyone and catch almost everything that is said. I really can. I have noticed that people don't really want to get to know me. They just want to pass their time until someone better comes along. I have stood in groups and had all the girls talk with each other and not ask me anything. Not even a simple how are you doing. It's really hard to stay strong emotionally when no one wants to show that they care. I could probably be studied for years because of how I feel. Is there anyone who truly wants to know the deep dark secrets of my life? Anyone? I have so much to say but can't because I don't feel like I can trust anyone. I have a hard time telling girls my secrets because of how loosely they talk of other's secrets. I hear of all these problems that were not supposed to be talked about. They still tell. I have never heard a guy share a buddy's secrets with others. Why do they have more respect for what someone has told them in confidence? Why can't girls just be true and keep it a secret? It is really not that hard to keep things that people tell you in trust from others. Really. It's not.
I am sorry for venting so. I just couldn't keep it to myself.
Maybe I want to get married so badly so I can trust someone with my all. I want to cry to someone who wants me to tell everything that is bottled up. All that I went through. Everything I feel and have hidden from myself and others. I want someone to love me. I have never really experienced what it is like to have someone of the opposite sex who is not related love me. I see all these girls with guys that just adore them and want to know what that are thinking. What he thinks of her. Can I just get a little snippet of their thoughts? Please? Just to help me understand a little better for when I see more couples that are so close and love each other so. Just a little would be ok with me.

Just breath.


Maybe it isn't the best to vent via blog post but I feel a lot better knowing that someone or many know of a little part of my thoughts.


I am done now. You can go back to whatever you were doing.

Happy spring by the way. Flowers are all over. New buds on the trees and all bulbs in bloom. So pretty.

Finally!!! Provo.

SO, I am finally on here!!!!! I have been waiting for something good to pop up. Not much to do, but I am having a blast here so far(when I have something to do that is). I have been having trouble getting to sleep before 3 in the morning:( So because of the fact I have been falling asleep so late I have been waking up really late too. I woke up around 12 today:(  I drew two pictures the first took ma a while then the second was more of a rough draft of a little picture from my drawing book. I have two institute classes each week. Tuesdays and Thursdays. I didn't catch the names of either but that doesn't matter because they are really good. I am not going to lie there are some pretty hot guys here! Some people say they are average but from what I see there are some REALLY good looking guys here. One was making melt inside because he just kept playing with a little girl as if she was his little sister. He is so cute, and tall too! Ah I was looking at the guys from different wards and not to be mean but the girls in those wards have it pretty bad. I got all the good looking ones in my ward!(Ha!) ;) So let me start at the beginning of the whole move....

First. Plan ahead because I left a few things that I really wouldn't mind having with me right now( my marble pastry board, cookie sheets, all my scrubs) The drive was long. It took what seemed like forever to get here. Now it seemed like it wasn't long enough. Thank heavens for food! We were starving and had to wait till we could find a good place to stop. Driving threw Nevada we thought we would find some good places(not the case at all) We stopped at a Burger King and they had no beef to serve because of broiler problems. I spotted a Raley's and we got some sandwiches there. They were ok, but not the best that I have had. We left and finally got to Provo around 1:45 am. We fell asleep at about 2 and then woke up for 8ish for the free continental breakfast, then fell asleep for about two hours while my mom got ready for the day and planned out what she wanted to do while we drove around that day(Thursday). We drove to my apartment and checked in. They front office had a glitch in their computer so the apartment they put me in was full(That place stunk to high heavens!). Oops! I called and went back in to change the key. I was placed in a better apartment, with no smell or nasty fish bowl that looked like it hadn't been cleaned in forever(Thank goodness!) After we brought all my stuff in, I grabbed my clothes for job hunting. I pressed them and we headed out! We stopped at a few places then went for dinner after. Later that night my mom said that she felt like I will get a job with one of the places but I just have to wait for now. Still waiting....

The next day we ate and got all ready for walking around BYU. It took a while to find a place to park. I think a bunch of students park in the visitors parking:(  We walked in and looked around the Music building. Then we headed over to the Cougar Eat for lunch with one of my mom's friends. It was fun. we all got our food then just sat and talked about life and things around Provo. She told me that if I ever need anything to message her via Facebook. I think that it is funny that I will be more likely to get in contact with her via Facebook than phone. After lunch we went to the motel and did really nothing for a while. I slept for a few hours. Then my mom and I went shopping for food for me! I thought the cost would be way higher but, I was proven wrong. The taxes in Utah are so much lower than in Cali. If I had bought the same stuff in Cali it would have been at least 30$+ for the whole lot. We dropped them off at my apartment and I got to show my mom how much room one of my roommates takes up in the fridge. I have one shelf. Nothing of mine is on the door and I have a small spot in the freezer on the door, but that is all I have very little room in there and to top   it off the one who takes up all the room will put her stuff on my shelf. Big no-no in my books. One doesn't simply take up the whole fridge, then use someone else's space because that have more food than they need. Ever. I always clean up after my self but this girl wont even wipe down the counter tops. How, lame. I am not one to be ok with this kind of crap in a shared living space that I am paying for so I have to keep my cool by walking away. She Doesn't care to ask me if it is ok to use my stuff. This afternoon I walked into the kitchen and found some of my paper towel in the sink. Never take my stuff and expect me to stay calm about it. I purposely put MY paper towel on my kitchen box so no one would touch it and she still used it. How do I know one may ask? I keep a bag on the floor for my trash because not even a day after I took the trash out the whole garbage can was completely full. Not cool. So I have a bag for my trash. I Haven't put any of my trash in the shared can to see if any of my stuff would be used. After they left(Her and Her boyfriend). I walked by the trash to see my paper towel in it! I lifted the lid up and found more of my paper towels in it!!! When I noticed the paper towel in the sink I walked around the counter to where my food and kitchen box is and placed the paper towel roll in a way that I would know if they had touched it later on. It had been. I was so ticked off! Like you can't even begin to fathom my disappointment when I discovered this. I wrote a note asking her to please ask if she wanted to use my stuff then told her if she wanted paper towel so badly she should buy her own and not steal mine. Now I know what you're thinking! This girl is over the top about paper towel! No. I am not. I am simply standing my ground when it comes to My personal belongings. If you want something please, don't steal from your neighbors, buy your own. Not a fun surprise for anyone at all.

So, after we dropped my food off we went out for dinner to random places. I wanted Noodles and Company and Brenton wanted Panda Express and My mom was ok with whatever. The next day we shopped for my cleaning stuff and some cooking stuff too. I don't remember what we did that day after shopping. I think we went to BYU for a few books for my mom's school classes. I was way to tired to remember.

Saturday, the last day with my mom and Haley and Brenton was spent in Salt Lake. We went to Distribution and I got a bunch of pictures for my walls. My mom got some stuff for Primary and Brenton got a magazine. After that we went to Temple Square and walked around and went inside the Visitors Center and another building then we randomly were really hungry so we looked around for a place to eat and found out that the mall was closed for construction:( So no food court. We stopped at a place for dinner(I am totally spacing on the name right now) and then met up with a  friend who served a good part of miss mission in our ward and his wife. It was fun! After that we stopped off at one of my mother's old friends house. We lived in that ward she is still in when I was born. S my mom was able to talk for a long time( I slept. It was lovely!) and then I started to mess with Brenton and then was good for a while. Haley and Her man friend drove up to Salt lake and we got a place to stay the night for them and after sitting in the room waiting for it to warm up my mom said that she would rather drive through the night that stay there. So she got her money back, The lady at the front counter was not happy at all! I went back to Provo with David after hugging my mom, Haley and Brenton goodbye and letting a few tears fall. It was scary going out on my own for the first time. I got to my apartment had a really good sleep and woke up, ate and got ready for my first day of church on my own. It was fun! I saw a few cute guys there. That night Amanda my roommate went to a friends house then our Home Teacher came over. He is so sweet! He sat there and listened to all I had to say for like 30+ minutes, and the bonus is, that he is really cute! He has really pretty blue eyes. After we talked, Amanda got back and I changed for Ward prayer. I have never had that before. I loved it! Then we went to one of Amanda's friends house watched a movie then after 12 went out for Mexican food! I got Flan! I hadn't had any since Cancun. It was yummy:) Then we got back and I passed out from being so tired. I had a good sleep.

I had my first FHE on monday last week. It was really good! Tuesday I had institute then watched tv for the rest of the night. Wednesday I really didn't do much. I walked around BYU for a few hours and talked to my best cousin Sierra then I went back to my apartment because my phone almost died on me. I ate and watched some tv then off to bed. Thursday I used the gym in the complex, had institute and then messed around on my laptop before bed. Friday I went to lunch with my awesome Home Teacher at Firehouse Subs. It was so yummy! We sat there, ate and talked for a couple of hours. It was fun! I never really get to just talk to people about random things. I loved it! We talked about food, movies, books, nasty bugs and injuries we had over the years. I had a really good time:)

Saturday I  went to Denny's to see if I could get some change for my laundry card. I ordered my food ate and then when I was paying I asked for cash back and the guy was like" Sorry, we don't give cash back." In my mind I was like "I wouldn't doubt that this is the only Denny's In the world that doesn't give cash back" Every one I have ever been too gave cash back but not this one. But it's all good I got some cash on Monday from when I went shopping for some meat( I was craving hotdogs. I know, random.)

I over slept on Sunday and didn't get to listen to the first session of Stake Conference but it was ok. Then we went back to our complex and after I got my coat we went to the second session. It was really good! I really enjoyed it! FHE from this week was fun! We went ice skating. It was a blast! I really had fun. Yesterday I had institute. It was good and I did my laundry for the first time. It was weird seeing old washers again.

Today was nothing special. Just ate and draw some pictures then blog about random things from my life.
Now that I have vented about my time here I will get off.

Night!
Sarahboolove.

The Big Move!

Tomorrow is my last full day in Cali! It is very strange that it is time for me to move already. It has not hit me that I am moving yet. Maybe tomorrow? I made my bread today.

Super soft and yummy! I am going to make soup in the morning. So my list of things to do before I go looks a little like this.

-Pack the car.
-Make sure I have all my clothing, boots, jackets, blankets, food storage.
-Go to bank to transfer the money I will need when I get there to my checking.
-Shower and make sure I have the clothes I will wear the first week packed in my little suitcase.
-Wash all my laundry.
-Do taxes with my sister.
-Make a list of all the dental offices around my apartment for job hunting.
-Make a list of all the meals I will be cooking the first two weeks.
-Take individual pictures with all my siblings and a family picture.
-Make chicken soup and Lion House Dinner Rolls.
-Shop for the food we are taking on the road.
-Cash my last pay check.
-Relax.

I know, super long list. I should be able to get almost all of it done in the morning. I was going to update a few weeks ago about my New Year and what has been going on this past month but, I got super busy and was not able to. :( 

Here is my pile of packed things from my room. I know, a Lot of stuff.

See my awesome boots!

I had my last day at work this past Friday. It was sad. I learned so much from working there! Dr. Black is probably the best Dentist I have ever known. I loved working with the girls there. I learned so much more than I thought I would in such a short time. Tiffany=Best RDA I know. I always loved coming into work. I had a blast. Traci made me laugh so many times, she is awesome. The crazy patients, long breaks between appointments, lots of chocolate and times I thought I would blow up from running around so much were so worth it. I am so glad I was able to work there.

I had my last day at the singles ward last week. I was sad. Sad that I wouldn't see all of my friends for a while. Sad because I wouldn't see my amazing cousin every week. Just sad because I love that ward! All the random conversations and awkward moments were so fun. One thing I am happy about is that because I am moving I will be able to be a real member of my new ward. I was not a member of that singles ward because I was not in the boundaries. I am happy to be in a new ward soon so I can make new friends, have random conversations, have awkward moments, meet new guys:), and be able to have a calling! I didn't have a calling in that ward. I was really sad that I didn't have one or even a visiting teacher. I didn't get a visiting teacher in my ward until this past October. I am happy to be starting a new life out in Ut. I am exited for the chance to learn about life on my own. I am happy to be able to make food and not have it disappear because of my little siblings. I will finally have my own room!!!! So happy about that one.

Oh random little blurb. My dad needed to take a trailer full of junk to the dump and I went with him. For some odd reason I wore my new Nike runners there. Let me just fill your mind with what is at the dump. All the dump trucks take everything from your house, the crazy neighbors house and everyone else's home and empties the trucks onto the side of this big huge pit(Landfill). I stepped in a dirty diaper while trying not to get dumped on by any of the hundreds of bird that were there(I am so afraid of birds. Not even kidding). The smell is vile, There were kitchen bags falling apart on the ground, old clothes, -personal items- :p yuck, hair, old toys, broken everything you can think of and a ton of bird droppings all around. Not the place to be wearing 100$ shoes. Not at all.

Here is a a picture of were I was standing by our car.(Cleaner than where I was standing when throwing things on the ground)

I cant think of anything else to blog about.
I am off to bed.
I will try to update this right after I get to UT.

Sweet dreams:)
Saraboo XOXO

I love my job.

So I am at work right now. On my lunch. Waiting for lunch to be over so I can go back to work. Cleaning, assisting, taking x-rays, whatever I can do to keep myself from falling asleep of sheer boredom. I love working in a dental office! It is so much fun! I love to help people with there Oral health. I love cleaning. I LOVE to clean. I love being able to just clean up as fast as I can to get the next patient in the room. I love to learn new things about dental. The newest thing I am learning about is implants. I now know what to set up for an implant prep. I hope I will be able to find a job in UT as a Dental Assistant. I love working in the dental field. I hope that when I have had all my little ones in the future I will be able to come back to dental and work my butt off before I retire.

Yesterday I kinda went on this cleaning spree in the front room of our home. I deep cleaned the whole front room from top to bottom. I even scraped all the paint from the window that had been stuck on for years now because we didn't have a ladder to reach the window. I should have taken before and after pictures of the whole room to post on here. After I cleaned everything I wanted too show it off but then I realized that I didn't take pictures.


I have to go back to work now. My lunch is over now.

I believe I am going to post again on all the things that have happened this past month tonight.

XOXO Sarahboo<3

New Year!!

Eek! It is already 2012. It is scary that last year went by so fast. I am so excited for this next year! I am going to be moving out the end of this month! Utah here I come(well in a couple weeks that is)! I really like the gifts I got for Christmas. Here they are! 

I am addicted to that hat!!

Look at how nice the spoon is!! There is also tupperwear on the top of the crockpot box. the little box is a tea ball for soups, stews and anything else(like dusting cakes and cookies with powdered sugar).

I bought the trunk and a Pilates ball and weighted balls for myself:)

This is just a short post for now. I hope to get back on here tomorrow night after work.

Love, Sarahboo:)